Figuring out who you want to be is a lifelong learning process—and, just for fun, we’re also expected to figure out how we want clients and colleagues to perceive us. In a vanilla job with a corporate culture, that’s often pretty straightforward. But if you’re a creative—an artist or performer, a stripper or escort, a musician or content creator—the product you’re selling is often yourself.

That ability to shape your own image is both a blessing and a curse. Aim for the broadest, most demographically palatable appeal and you risk getting washed away in an ocean of interchangeable normies. Be too specific, too niche, too “I wrote a ten-page Space Jam manifesto and this is my brand now,” and suddenly you look closed off—like there’s no room for anyone who might connect with the parts of you that didn’t make the cut.

Talking about myself has always been the hardest part. I’d freeze up, worried I’d sound boastful or self-important, and end up tossing in a jokey non-sequitur instead of anything actually useful. Maybe I thought being mysterious and silly was enough. More often than not, engagement on my profiles was limited to people who already knew me.

Eventually, the frustration of being ignored outweighed the discomfort of trying. When there’s nothing to lose, it’s a lot easier to throw things at the wall and see what sticks. Slowly, as I let more of myself show, something interesting happened: the responses felt more organic. The things people connected with weren’t polished buzzwords or carefully engineered personas—they were the little cracks where my snark and silly nerd energy slipped through.

Realizing that my own particular flavor of weird was exactly what my clientele loved was… intoxicating. Not in an ego way (okay, maybe a little), but in the “oh, this is what self-esteem feels like” way. Your vibe really does attract your tribe. If you try to broadcast on a frequency that isn’t yours, people can tell—and it’s awkward for everyone involved.

But when you can marry professionalism with empathy for your audience and your actual personality—even a slightly exaggerated, caricatured version of it—that’s where the magic happens. That’s when people don’t just see what you offer; they feel like they get you.

The world is your hot dog. You just have to let em really smell how good it is!

If you’re a client:
What made you stop scrolling? Was it a vibe, a joke, a shared interest, or something else entirely? I’m genuinely curious what actually resonates with you.

If you’re a provider or creative:
What part of yourself did you stop hiding—and how did it change the way people showed up for you?

Drop a comment, share your experience, or tell me what finally clicked. Let’s compare notes!